1. Ban Pre-Wedding Sex
You’ve already enjoyed each other carnally, but you can still try to create the kind of anticipation that isn’t normally present in your everyday sex life for this special occasion. For a period of time before the wedding, ban all sexual contact so that your desire for each other will build up until the wedding night. The ban time will vary for each couple, depending on how often you usually get frisky.
The basic formula is to hold out for twice as long as you normally would. If you are a few-times-a-week couple, a week-long sex ban should be sufficient, but if you tend to do it only once every other week, you might want to keep up the no sex rule for as long as a month before you say “I do.” To increase the expectation even more, add a “no nudity in each other’s presence” clause to your sex-ban agreement.
2. Get a Room
You may already be living together before your nuptials, but in order to make your wedding night special, you should spend it somewhere other than home. Put yourself in unfamiliar surroundings by booking a nice hotel room for the night. If you have some room left in the wedding budget, why not spring for the honeymoon suite? The point is to change the venue from the site of your everyday sex life to make your first time as husband and wife seem different and special.
3. Do It Early
Whether your wedding is a black tie affair or a casual beach event, the festivities will no doubt leave both of you exhausted by the end of the night. Traditionally, you’re supposed to wait until after the reception is over before you get your chance to be alone together, but you’re already flouting tradition with your premarital sex, so you might as well take a different approach here too. Don’t wait until you’re dead tired and probably at least a little drunk to consummate your marriage. Agree to sneak away during your reception to have a little alone time. The party will continue without you for a while; if need be, explain your plan to your best man and maid of honor so they can cover for you.
4. Help Her Out of Her Dress
Chances are your blushing bride is going to be dressed in an elaborate and difficult-to-get-into gown on your wedding night. She needs at least two bridesmaids to hold it up while she goes to the bathroom, so getting it over her head once you make it to the bedroom could be a challenge. Make taking her dress off part of your foreplay instead of letting her struggle with it on her own. Don’t get frustrated with the various buttons, bows and fasteners. Take your time and make it fun.
5. Married Sex
Now that you’re married, you can let go of any inhibitions you might still have and fully enjoy your sex life with your wife. Married sex doesn’t have to be boring and routine. Start it off right by creating the perfect situation for some mind-blowing sex as husband and wife.
1. Never have a "type" of orgasm — have your orgasm.
We’re always hearing about the types of climax possible in realizing your sexual satisfaction. I certainly write about them regularly. But instead of trying to have a breast, clitoral, G-spot or blended orgasm, forget the labels and have yours. Don’t worry about having a specific type, but focus on pampering your whole body, attending to any of its hot spots. This beckons your orgasm by not being so goal-oriented.
2. Never talk about past sexual relationships.
“What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” needs to apply to all of the sexual trysts you’ve ever had anywhere. Don’t invite distress into your current romance by reminiscing about the good times or bad times you’ve had with other jerks, hotties, players, loves... No good can come of kissing and telling. Focus on the present and making it the most memorable.
3. Never let sex get routine.
While it’s wise to get in a routine to make sure sex happens, don’t let the sex itself get routine. This only invites monotony and the mundane. With the carnal becoming common, lovers start to feel like they’re just going through the motions. To keep things hot, be sure to keep things new and fresh.
4. Never just lie there.
A big complaint you’ll hear from men and women alike is that their lover didn’t do much of anything during sex. Men have grumbled that she doesn’t move during lovemaking. Most people like an active lover — one responsive to the action, which shows that they’re into the moment.
5. Never move in together (or get married) a second time.
Unless you’re hoping that an eventual “third time’s the charm” will do the trick, don’t press replay when it comes to cohabitating or getting hitched. Things didn’t work out the first time for good reason. Maybe you love each other, but if you’re incompatible or fight too much, it’s better to cut your losses and move on to a situation that does work.
6. Never drink cheap beer and stay overnight.
While your choice beverage may have made things a hoot last night, it runs the risk of making you toot the next morning. Don’t set yourself up to be someone’s gassy guest. Get the walk of shame over with sooner rather than later, lest you stink up someone’s bedroom and bathroom. This is not the kind of lasting impression most seducers are after.
7. Never drink more than 1-2 glasses of alcohol.
While spirits can do a lot for one’s spirits, sexual self-confidence, and libido, keep your booze to a minimum. More than a couple of glasses can cause erectile difficulties in men and vaginal dryness in women. Being buzzed or drunk can also lead to high-risk sexual behaviors. So make sure you milk your glass, enjoying more of the intimate encounter than the experience of being intoxicated.
8. Never compare yourself to Victoria’s Secret or Abercrombie models.
Unless you, too, have access to air-brushing, it does not do you any good to think that these real-life moving mannequins are the standard by which you should judge your face or form. You’ve got your own unique look and that can be super sexy, depending on how you wear it. That starts with a smile and indicating to others that you feel quite good about yourself.
9. Never totally trust magazine sex tips.
Put a doughnut around his "manhood" and slowly nibble it off? Put your underwear in the freezer? What? These are just a couple of the sex tips popular press magazines have suggested when it comes to amping up the action. While their creativity is to be admired, don’t mindlessly go through the motions. Think about the suggestion first. Is it hot or completely ridiculous? Will it work for your sexual relationship? Or does it have the potential to sabotage your sex life?
10. Never douche before sex.
Despite popular belief, douching is not a safe or healthy way to clean the vagina. Doing so upsets the vagina’s delicate chemical balance, increasing your chance of developing pelvic inflammatory disease or other health problems. Let the vagina naturally cleanse itself and worry about other much sexier activities pre-sex.
11. Never attempt tricky Kama Sutra positions if you are not flexible.
While looking like a pretzel may lead to more passion, you’re not going to get any action if you’re throwing out your back. Stick with pursuing sexual positions that are comfortable for you. Good sex doesn’t require becoming a sexual gymnast.
12. Never listen to somebody slamming your sexy self.
Is a guy suggesting that you get breast implants? Is some gal making fun of your penis size? In either case, ignore the criticism, or in the very least, fire back with something like, “What do you care? You’ll never get a piece of me anyway...”
